A male perspective

S I N G L E    N E S S  - a male perspective

I was asked it I could write something about being single from a male perspective. “Ha” I thought “I bet they had to think really hard to come up with my name.”

As a teenager I was way to shy to ask a girl out and I was convinced that no girl could actually like me this side of a body transplant and major self-esteem overhaul. Unfortunately that body transplant will never happen, but some of the personality overhaul did occur in my early twenties and I came to know myself, I believed in myself, and liked myself, so now I could go out and get the girls right? Ha – I was still way too shy.

I did come close though, one of my work mates in varsity was, well, what can I say, perfect. I liked her and she liked me (yeah, I was surprised too), except she wasn't a Christian. I could've, should've asked her out anyway, but I was too intimidated by “Thou shalt not be unfairly yoked” and I was told “You are setting a good example to the teenagers in the church youth group, a relationship is not the be-all and end-all of life”. Great, so I didn't ask her out, but tried to evangelise her instead. Looking back I like to blame the church for my stupidity, and for my singleness. 

Ten years ago I would have hoped to be married by now and I would worry about it and write terrible, angst ridden poems. Five years ago (coincidentally about the time I left church) I started to relax a bit more and just enjoy my life. Am I happy being single? Well no, not happy, I can give you “content” – it's enabled me to do things I mightn't have done otherwise - but I miss not having that special someone to hug and hold, travel with, laugh with, argue about the TV remote with…… It takes a special person to be single their whole life and I honestly don't want to be that special.